In my last post I talked you through why I fell for Chupi as a brand and shared the beautiful way they do their gift coins, which I was lucky enough to have a few of ahead of my Dublin trip last month.
Today I thought I'd start with sharing the pieces I decided to spend those coins on.
One of the Chupi gift coins that I had was a gift from three of my best friends - Lynsey, Gill and Lauren - who clubbed together to give me a very generous birthday gift in 2021. I've got a Chupi wishlist the length of my arm and I did consider putting the coin with some others to get a more expensive piece, but in the end I went for the heart ring and I am so, so pleased with my decision. It wasn't one I made particularly quickly, I had the coin for the best part of 6 months between my birthday and my trip so I had a lot of time to consider the options but I had a lot of reasons behind making the decision I did in the end because I had a lot of things I wanted this piece to represent.
Firstly, I wanted a piece that I would look at and think of those women specifically, I wanted something that would symbolise who my support systems were around the time I turned 30.
I am someone who didn't find her people until later in life. I love the idea and the romance of people who have been friends since school, but it didn't happen for me. I always had people to get along with and whatever, but I never felt particularly connected to anyone until I met the people I have around me now when I was in my 20s.
As might make sense for someone who was incredibly introverted and didn't have many people in real life to discuss her random enjoyments with, I met these women through the internet - through having blogs way back in the day before Instagram, before anyone made a living from blogging, before having a website was a standard expectation for, well, anyone really. Back when, far from being an expectation, it was your strange hobby you definitely didn't tell anyone about. I met Gill and Lynsey through blogging and Lauren and Gill worked together, so had Gill and I never met, I'd have also by default never met Lauren. Although the internet and I certainly have had our ups and downs and there are moments when I look back on the nonsense I would post when I was twenty - fresh out of school and a gap year, embarking on university and life without a clue - and want to slap some sense into me for ever having thought about things in the way I did, I can't ever regret beginning when I did, else I might not even know these women now.
And, quite frankly, I don't want to imagine what my life would look like without them in it. We've done all the fun adventuring stuff together, from Glasgow to London to New York and back, but we've also been constant in one another's lives whilst we've each in turn navigated huge changes, from moving countries, to getting and quitting our first post uni 'career' move jobs, finding out in some cases that those careers are not actually what we want, changes of heart about directions in life, the starts and ends of some short term and some long term romantic relationships, health scares, grief and, now that we're heading into our 30s, some terrifyingly huge life questions - throughout all of the above, we've been there for one another, with wine, comfort, tough love and a hive mind that has never failed yet.
All in all, I love these women, and I wanted to use the gift coin they gave me towards something that would symbolise me and them, rather than letting the gift coin become part of something that ended up being a mix of different gift coins from different places, so what really could have been more perfect than this slightly imperfect, raw and beautiful heart ring?
I did put some of my own money with the gift coin to purchase this ring and that's why I've written that it's something to symbolise me and them, because as well as reminding me of how much I love them, I want this ring to serve as a reminder to love myself.
I fully appreciate that that sounds rather cliched, but I've spent a lot of time not loving myself and not treating myself well, berating myself for the slightest misstep or hiccup and, given the gift coin was for a birthday that marks a new decade in life, that's a behaviour I am endeavouring not to bring into this new decade with me.
In my last post I talked about the way my consumer habits have changed over the past few years - and why Chupi is a brand that appeals to the way I want to shop and consume going forward - but a lot about me has changed over the last decade. As I said, when I think about some of the things I said and did and blogged about in my early 20s, I'm mortified, horrified, that I was ever as dense and blind to my own privileges as I was.
But I am not that person anymore. I've spent time since then learning and growing and developing as a person.. The things I value have changed. My priorities have changed. And I'd like to think I'm a far better person than I was then - thanks in no small part to having truly brilliant friends who do widen my world view, who wouldn't let me off the hook if I was being ignorant about something, who will indulge me wittering on for hours on end about something as I work through my thought processes on it.
However, I'm under no illusions that I am done, nor do I have any desire to consider myself done. I want to keep growing, improving, changing and developing. I have things on my list I still want to achieve. But most things, myself included, don't grow well in harsh climates where they aren't looked after and their needs aren't tended to. I want to use the heart ring as a way of reminding myself to love myself, to be kind to myself and, by doing so, to give myself the optimum climate in which to grow and improve and to get those things on that list done.
And the last reason for choosing the love heart ring to buy was that it also serves as a reminder of my trip to Dublin itself. My heart was very happy in Dublin, I felt incredibly at peace in the city. It's a beautiful place, imbued with history but far from stuck in the past. It's a compact size that feels manageable and not overwhelming, but it contains everything I would want it to. It has its own green spaces and the river running through it means you never feel quite as swallowed by stone and concrete and man as you sometimes can in other cities. And, location wise, Dublin is a stones throw really from Wicklow National Park, from swathes of seaside and beach towns, from numerous ways to feel completely and utterly removed from a city if you need to. Plus everyone knows how to pronounce Roisin without me having to do the obligatory explanation and the, 'No, nothing like it looks written down, I know,' routine whenever I arrive anywhere for a reservation. (It's roe-sheen, btw, in case you were wondering. It's Irish for Rose.)
Basically, before I turn this post into a love letter to Dublin itself, if I was to tick off certain things on that list I mentioned and it was to leave me in the position to do so, I would move to Dublin quite happily. I felt settled and at home in a way that, as with all things that you feel deeply and soulfully, is difficult to articulate with merely mortal words.
Whilst moving country has a lot more to be considered than just whether I felt at peace in it or not, I want the heart ring to serve as a reminder of how much I loved the place. And part of the reason I want to ensure I focus on remembering that love is to keep me reminded of the fact that Dublin is incredibly close to Scotland. In fact, during the multiple reschedules of the trip thanks to Covid, I definitely made the (half) joking remark of 'Do you think they'd notice if I snuck in by swimming over and just coming up on the beach at Dun Laoghaire?' quite a few times.
For years I felt my holidays had to be big trips - ideally to the US, even staying in Europe didn't feel like a 'proper' holiday for a while. I'd go to London multiple times a year and think of it as a 'week away' rather than a 'holiday' and I spent so much time not appreciating some great trips because I was so focussed on when I'd next be in New York or whatever. That's another thing I want to leave behind. I read something last year about how small joy and big joy are the same - that you can get the same joy from seeing a film or having a nice meal as you can from a 'big' holiday or whatever. I want to try and keep that in mind, to remember how much I adored Dublin, even though it was a one hour flight. I want to remember that I don't need to spend thousands and thousands on one holiday for it to 'count'.
And the fact that ring is an outline, an open heart is symbolic to me too. It keeps me feeling like Dublin is open to me returning to it. It reminds me to have an open heart, to be open to joy and love and kindness. To be open with my friends, to allow myself to be vulnerable with them because they are a safe, open space for me to access and to offer them the same open, safe space in return.
All of the meaning of the piece aside, which is entirely personal to me and, really, irrelevant to you if you're reading this because you're considering purchasing this ring - let's talk cold and hard practicalities.
This ring is made from solid 14k gold - mine is obviously the yellow gold version, which I personally prefer as I like the warmth traditional yellow gold offers but it does also come in white gold.
Caoilfhionn of @_wearwhatworks fame on Instagram got this ring for Christmas 2020 and I took the opportunity at the time to message her and ask my number one question about this piece that I had from looking online at it - which was about how solid it is.
I am not a careful person and for how dainty and delicate the ring looked online, especially with it being the outline, I was a bit concerned that I would bash it out of shape. You can see Caoilfhionn's reply there and I completely agree with her - the ring is solid and, whilst I haven't sat around and tried to squash it, it seems like it will retain its solid shape!
The other thing I really like about this ring and that has, in the short 6 weeks or so that I've had these pieces thus far, meant it has become my most worn of the three Chupi pieces I have become the proud owner of, is that it's flat to my finger.
I adore the 'big' ring purchase that I made - which will have its own blog post - but the first day after Dublin that I wore it I put my glove on without really thinking. Unlike this one, that ring sits high up off the finger and I was putting on knitted gloves, the glove caught on the ring, the wool pulled and I thankfully noticed quickly enough to stop pulling and slowly reverse before any rips were caused, but it was a close call. I also don't like wearing it under my leather gloves - they will stretch around it but I'm wary of stretching the leather on that one finger and then ending up with it looking a bit odd anytime I wear the gloves without the ring. Gloves aside, when I have worn the ring, I've caught it in my hair and in a pair of earrings - on separate and multiple occassions - because clearly I talk with my hands and touch my hair and face a bit too much. I absolutely adore it and I'm so glad I own it, but it's been an oddly specific learning curve to adjust to wearing something that sticks up off the hand and because I do wear gloves almost daily at this time of year, I'm not wearing it often enough to have completely adjusted yet.
That, for obvious reasons, hasn't been an issue with this ring. I've worn it to the gym, I've worn it to eat fast food with, I've slept with it on and I've not had any issues whatsoever with it catching on anything.
Of the three pieces I own, this is the one that is on the fast track to becoming the every day piece that I get the most wear from. I do think, once the weather gets a little warmer, I'll be wearing the other ring on a daily basis as well. I bought the two rings in particular with the intention being that they would be worn every day, specifically not kept for special occasions (in the way I'd keep a pair of shoes or a dress, items that have a finite amount of wear in them for only special days) so that is the aim - but from a purely practical point of view, this one is already hedging its way ahead of the other pieces.
All in all, I'm thrilled with this ring. I think the idea of a heart ring could be somewhat twee, but this isn't a perfect heart - it's got just enough of an edge and an interest and depth to it that I still feel like a woman when wearing it, not like a little girl. I can't fault the quality and design wise, it has slotted itself into my lifestyle really easily, holding its own and being beautiful but without ever imposing itself.
Safe to say, I'm quite happily in love.
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